Juggling Commitments Can Be Difficult
Once we make a commitment, God expects us to honor that commitment (Mt 5:37, LB). However, are there ever biblically valid reasons for breaking a commitment? Yes. If the other party fails to do their part, we may be allowed to then view ourselves as no longer bound. For instance, God had committed Himself to protect Israel but His commitment to do this was contingent on Israel fulfilling their obligations in the commitment. Even here, though, we should be careful to not automatically break a commitment (LAB note on Gen 29:28-30). Remember, the Lord was very, very patient with Israel’s failures to keep their part of the covenant before He withdrew from them the contingent part of His commitment to them. Likewise, if we make a minor commitment and an emergency comes up, surely this could be a valid reason to not be true to our word. We are to be honest, but most would agree that not being honest could be okay if there were the kind of emergency where someone would die if we were honest. An example is Rahab protecting the lives of the two Israelite spies. Furthermore, I believe a marital commitment can be abrogated under certain extreme circumstances. The overall biblical stance, though, is that commitment and integrity are very important and should be set aside only under compelling circumstances or with the permission of the one to whom the commitment was made.
How should we handle it if we very much want someone to do something but they have a prior commitment or simply don’t think it best for them to commit to what we want? In 1 Cor 16:12, the apostle Paul urged Apollos to do something. Apollos disagreed with Paul and withstood the appeals. He said ‘no.’ He did what he thought was right even though that meant disagreeing with a strong authority figure who could hold a grudge and try to limit his ministry opportunities. Apollos needed to follow his conscience (Rom 14:23) and Paul needed to honor that without any retaliation.
Juggling commitments can be difficult. Someone may well be disappointed, not simply with our decision, but with us as individuals. They may genuinely want what is best for us and believe we are wrong if we disagree with them. May the Lord give us the strength to do what we think is right and to accept any negative consequences with faith and joy (Acts 5:29 with 41).
Comforting others is costly but worth it.