Look For Evidence To Support A Claim
Do we do an adequate job of gathering the pertinent facts before coming to a conclusion? Proverbs 18:17 encourages us to listen to both sides of a matter. The apostle Paul told Governor Felix that the accusation against him could not be proven (Prov 24:13). The assumption is that there should be reasonable proof to accuse someone of wrongdoing (Mt 18:15). This is why the Bereans were commended for gathering biblical evidence to see if what Paul said about Jesus being the Christ could be accurate (Acts 17:11).
In the 18th century Buffon, a very well-respected naturalist, said that the physical conditions of America would hinder the healthy development of plants and humans. He never went to America to see for himself (Tuchman, First Salute, p 77). Another example of jumping to a conclusion without knowing the facts concerned Julia Grant, Ulysses S. Grant’s wife. Near the end of the Civil War, after Lincoln left the Hampton Roads conference with Confederate officials, he met Julia. At first, she criticized Lincoln for not coming to terms with the Southern representatives. Once Lincoln told her the terms he had offered them, she realized that Lincoln had been very kind in his offer and that her criticism of Lincoln was wrong (Boller, Presidential Wives, p 141).
How many times do we criticize others without knowing enough information? We do far better to suspend judgment until or unless we develop an adequate understanding to make our evaluation fair (Jn 7:24).
When God wants a couple or family to alter course, the revelation is normally clear.