Our Mistakes Can Spur Growth
We are to be humble enough to confess our sins to God (1 Jn 1:9). Besides this, there will be times we are to confess our shortcomings to appropriate others (Jas 5:16). This should not be a rare event since even the best of us make many mistakes (Jas 3:2, NLT). Hence, “A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser to-day than he was yesterday” (Pope).
It is often difficult for us to admit we were wrong. Such admission can bring healing to us or our relationships (Jas 5:16). It may spare us and others from unnecessary pain. By confessing, we can demonstrate that we have heard others and are concerned about their complaints and desires. Admission of being wrong displays respect for others and that we value them. We show we want truth more than control; mutual satisfaction more than domination; humility and grace (1 Pet 5:5) more than pride and estrangement. Instead of being a source of shame, “the confession of evil works is the first beginning of good works” (Augustine). Let us not be reluctant to admit our mistakes once it is clear that we have erred.
If you are now married or hope to be married someday, this is an especially important lesson to learn. Our ability to trust our spouse will be weakened if our mate is consistently unwilling to admit their mistakes. A good marriage requires that both be humble enough to forgive and ask for forgiveness. We won’t ask for forgiveness if we refuse to acknowledge our wrongdoings. In the normal course of getting close in marriage, we will unintentionally hurt one another (Prov 27:17). Yet, being opposed to confessing that we hurt our spouse is a self-centered arrogance that will doom deep intimacy. Let us confess, turn from wrongdoing as best we can, and be healed as a result.
Comforting others is costly but worth it.